Post a short two sentence or less odd situation you were in

[Dark Raver Camper]

I'm not really sure why or how I thought of this. I probably have a few dozen.

 

I once was caught hooking up with a girl, by the police, in an abandoned warehouse area. That isnt abnormal, however I brought a crab mallet with me, for no known reason, and the cop took it from me.

[Sol Aristatel]

I once got pulled over by a Cop in Wickieup, AZ on the way back from Vegas.  The cop was none other than Dan Patrick.  I expected the cameras to come out any time and tell me I was punked.  It never happened.  Fucking Dan Patrick wrote me a ticket.  Bastard. 

[BarryRunSome]

I was talking to a co worker one time and said something a little rude about a girl. Slipped my mind it was his wife. I had a brainfart

[TommyL]

Hooked up with a random girl in college that I met that night and ended up in her dorm.  Next morning, I'm awoken to some 50-year old woman who is standing over me and shaking the girl next to me (as I'm in nothing but my boxers).  She says "Mom, what are you doing", and the woman says "xxx, I couldn't tell you over the phone so I had to come and tell you in person, Nana died last night in her sleep".  Girl loses it and start crying and hugging her mom over me.  Most akward moment of my life.

[KingRevolver]

I banged this hot chick's (easily a 9 out of 10) foot once.  We got really drunk the night before and slept in the same bed, unfortunately I passed out, but the next morning... I woke up and saw her next to me... I started rubbing myself on her foot and came in like two minutes.  True story.

[Yanks]

Was sitting in a parking lot doing a few lines trying to sober up. Next thing I know a cop pulls up. Long story short he find half an 8ball and takes it. Throws it down the sewer and says he went to high school with my father and owes my father a favor so to get the hell out of there.

 

I went and got more Coke

[BarryRunSome]

I banged this hot chick's (easily a 1.342678 out of 10) foot once.  We got really drunk the night before and slept in the same bed, unfortunately I passed out, but the next morning... I woke up and saw her next to me... I started rubbing myself on her foot and came in like two minutes.  True story.

Fixed it for ya, DipShit

[KingRevolver]

Fixed it for ya, DipShit

 

You should've fixed it with something mildly funny.

[Blue]

I banged this hot chick's (easily a 9 out of 10) foot once.  We got really drunk the night before and slept in the same bed, unfortunately I passed out, but the next morning... I woke up and saw her next to me... I started rubbing myself on her foot and came in like two minutes.  True story.

 

:lebrick

[Blue]

Got pulled over at 1 or 2am on a sunday night on way to AC, 2 strippers in my car, a black and an Asian, we were smoking a bowl when we got pulled over and I was fucking hammered, the NJ state trooper doesn't say a word about anything just wrote me the speeding ticket. 100% true story. lol.

[Blue]

Hooked up with a random girl in college that I met that night and ended up in her dorm.  Next morning, I'm awoken to some 50-year old woman who is standing over me and shaking the girl next to me (as I'm in nothing but my boxers).  She says "Mom, what are you doing", and the woman says "xxx, I couldn't tell you over the phone so I had to come and tell you in person, Nana died last night in her sleep".  Girl loses it and start crying and hugging her mom over me.  Most akward moment of my life.

 

holy shit sounds like a Will Ferrel movie lol

[Dark Raver Camper]

Killing will like this, however it will be more than two sentences.

 

I was in my stomping grounds of a.c.. the club I would go to was studio 6, which was known to be a gay club, however on Saturdays would be crazy, with extremely hot and trashy girls there.

 

I went by myself to a.c., for a gambling jaunt, which would last for a few days to a week. I go to the place on a Tuesday, and it was somewhat dead. Maybe 50 people. No one I know is there.

 

I'm looking for shit. No one knows anything, blah, blah. I get it. Some one points me in the direction of a he/she. It was a guy, in drag. I dunno if it was just drag or ducking Jenner like.

 

I sit next to he/she and buy them a drink. I state my intentions, which is I want coke. He/shecwas hesitant, understandably so, and thought I was a cop. I engaged he/she in conversation for a good 30 minutes, and even showed he/she my drivers license, per he/she's request. Things were about to transpire, then he/she gets nervous because there is a guy standing behind us.

 

I bought he/she two drinks already and invested a lot of time. I was annoyed. I'm not sure if fella was a lost soul, like me, or he was trying to get with he/she. I asked him what was up, and told him to get lost. At Times I'm confrontational, however this was a different situation. This guy was fucking up things for me.

 

I ended up getting the coke, gave he/she a gram, which we did, and he/she invited me to their house, or whatever it was, cuz there was an after party.

 

I pay for a cab and we're at he/ she's house and start doing rail lines. After about 30 minutes I ask he/she where are the other people? I didn't immediately get an answer, rather a look ill never forget. Some sort of evil half ass smile. Then something like they are coming. About 10 minutes later I bolted when he/she went to the bathroom. This was in like the projects by the showboat.

 

I look back at it now and laugh even more than I did, however the situation isn't all that funny. It was straight up flame.

[Yanks]

Killing will like this, however it will be more than two sentences.

 

I was in my stomping grounds of a.c.. the club I would go to was studio 6, which was known to be a gay club, however on Saturdays would be crazy, with extremely hot and trashy girls there.

 

I went by myself to a.c., for a gambling jaunt, which would last for a few days to a week. I go to the place on a Tuesday, and it was somewhat dead. Maybe 50 people. No one I know is there.

 

I'm looking for shit. No one knows anything, blah, blah. I get it. Some one points me in the direction of a he/she. It was a guy, in drag. I dunno if it was just drag or ducking Jenner like.

 

I sit next to he/she and buy them a drink. I state my intentions, which is I want coke. He/shecwas hesitant, understandably so, and thought I was a cop. I engaged he/she in conversation for a good 30 minutes, and even showed he/she my drivers license, per he/she's request. Things were about to transpire, then he/she gets nervous because there is a guy standing behind us.

 

I bought he/she two drinks already and invested a lot of time. I was annoyed. I'm not sure if fella was a lost soul, like me, or he was trying to get with he/she. I asked him what was up, and told him to get lost. At Times I'm confrontational, however this was a different situation. This guy was fucking up things for me.

 

I ended up getting the coke, gave he/she a gram, which we did, and he/she invited me to their house, or whatever it was, cuz there was an after party.

 

I pay for a cab and we're at he/ she's house and start doing rail lines. After about 30 minutes I ask he/she where are the other people? I didn't immediately get an answer, rather a look ill never forget. Some sort of evil half ass smile. Then something like they are coming. About 10 minutes later I bolted when he/she went to the bathroom. This was in like the projects by the showboat.

 

I look back at it now and laugh even more than I did, however the situation isn't all that funny. It was straight up flame.

[Dark Raver Camper]

I consider it a win because I got the coke.

[WeinkeToWarrick]

Had a buddy find out I posted on a forum, pasted a couple of my posts into a group text message with a bunch of buddies.

[Sol Aristatel]

When I was in college at ASU, I got a part time job as a bank teller at First Interstate Bank (now Wells Fargo).  My very first day on the job I was shadowing this other teller and he was showing me the ropes.

 

In walked this black tranny.  Dressed to the nines.  He was quite the sight.  Looked like he hadn't shaved in a couple of days.  But he didn't care.  He put the makeup on right over the stubble.  

 

He hands the teller a credit card and says he wants a $500 cash advance. Teller looks at the card.  Looks at the tranny, and says he needs approval from the manager and he will be right back.  

 

After two minutes the teller comes back.  Before he could even say a word, the tranny takes off running for the door.  Cops catch him in the parking lot and arrest him.  I was thinking WTF is going on here??

 

So this was the deal...  The credit card the tranny had?  It was this teller's wife's credit card.  No shit.  His wife's purse was stolen the day before at her place of work.  Then with this guys luck he actually goes and tries the transaction with the girls husband.  Teller went and told the manager and she called the police.

 

What are the odds?  Crazy shit. 

[KingRevolver]

When I was in college at ASU, I got a part time job as a bank teller at First Interstate Bank (now Wells Fargo).  My very first day on the job I was shadowing this other teller and he was showing me the ropes.

 

In walked this black tranny.  Dressed to the nines.  He was quite the sight.  Looked like he hadn't shaved in a couple of days.  But he didn't care.  He put the makeup on right over the stubble.  

 

He hands the teller a credit card and says he wants a $500 cash advance. Teller looks at the card.  Looks at the tranny, and says he needs approval from the manager and he will be right back.  

 

After two minutes the teller comes back.  Before he could even say a word, the tranny takes off running for the door.  Cops catch him in the parking lot and arrest him.  I was thinking WTF is going on here??

 

So this was the deal...  The credit card the tranny had?  It was this teller's wife's credit card.  No shit.  His wife's purse was stolen the day before at her place of work.  Then with this guys luck he actually goes and tries the transaction with the girls husband.  Teller went and told the manager and she called the police.

 

What are the odds?  Crazy shit. 

 

Weave us another one, pal.

[Sol Aristatel]

Weave us another one, pal.

 

 

Swear on my wife and kids that happened pal.  My very first day on the job.  The branch was on Central and Clarendon.  

[Dark Raver Camper]

That same trip, I got an escort, from the back of a.c. weekly. It was the girl in the picture of the agency. Trashy hot blonde.

 

The next day I was to check out, however called on the floor, or wherever, and got an extra day. I'm playing and go back to the room and I can't get in.

 

I call down and they straighten it out. They thought I was gone, and the maid took my clothes. I didn't bring an attire beside what I had on. I had to get it from lost and found. When I did, I said thAt I had two hundred dollars in my jeans, but it was gone. I really didn't and could only think that I was broke or maybe just sick in the head.

 

Trop security came up and questioned me. They did lock interagstions, and reviewed video.

 

They said that a blond girl came to my room, alone, and went in. I'm not sure if they turned the tables on me, or if the girl swiped a key, and went in

Needless to say she didn't get anything.

 

I'm a sinner.

[KingRevolver]

I believe you, pal.  I just wanted to say, "Weave us another one..." 

[Sol Aristatel]

I believe you, pal.  I just wanted to say, "Weave us another one..." 

 

 

k

[Yanks]

Diabler

Hey do me a favor.. while showing the kiddies a movie tomorrow please think up a more believable story and jot it down on a 3 ring binder, double spaced, with a Number 2 pencil and then type it on here.

 

Thanks

[Sol Aristatel]

Diabler

Hey do me a favor.. while showing the kiddies a movie tomorrow please think up a more believable story and jot it down on a 3 ring binder, double spaced, with a Number 2 pencil and then type it on here.

 

Thanks

 

[BarryRunSome]

I believe you, pal.  I just wanted to say, "Weave us another one..." 

 

Diabler

Hey do me a favor.. while showing the kiddies a movie tomorrow please think up a more believable story and jot it down on a 3 ring binder, double spaced, with a Number 2 pencil and then type it on here.

 

Thanks